We had a good Father's Day honoring Travis and my grandpa. Both of these men are heros in my eyes. Such a good example of what a father should be; loving, giving, compassionate, supportive, fun and caring. I have posted several times about what an amazing father and husband Travis is so today I am going to focus on my grandpa. This month I am giving my grandpa the blog award. He doesn't even know the address to my blog but he knows about my struggle with weight and has been supportive recently. In honor of father's day..he wins! I couldn't find a picture of us that was digital. I had a ton of him with my kids but none of just the two of us. I guess I better work on that.
My grandpa is really special to me. We are a lot a like and his perseverance and accomplishments amaze me. People that don't know my family very well sometimes think that my grandparents have always been the way they are...they see the big house, the boat, the nice cars, they hear about the vacations they are going on and I think some think that they have a lavish lifestyle. While this may seem to be the case my grandpa worked very hard to get them to this place in life and they deserve every bit of it.
My grandfather's dad was killed when he was very young, he moved around a lot and even lived in the projects of Brooklyn as a young boy. His parents didn't have much and they were very strict. He was not allowed to dance or even to go to movies. He knew that he wanted a life that was different and he was determined to change it. It can be so hard to break away but he did. He got his first job when he was very young and practiced being independent, responsible and saved his money wisely. He is very strong willed and never wanted to take anything from anyone. If he couldn't do it on his own, he wouldn't do it. He married my grandma when he was 19; she had recently been given a car for her 16th birthday, my grandpa made her return the car to her parents since he hadn't provided it for her. He went on to farm and garden to put food on the table for his kids, he attended night school for about a year of business college, he took side jobs pouring concrete whenever he could and got a job at the local irrigation district digging ditches.
They had 3 kids before by the time was grandpa was 22 and they were poor as church mice. They lost a daughter, Cheryl Lynn, in a car accident when she was six. I was named after her. They have had trials and tribulations but they stuck together and persevered. My grandparents taught me the importance of marriage and making your spouse #2 (God is #1). I think many put the relationship with their children as #2 but your kids leave the house and your spouse you have your whole life. I agree and think that it is so important for parents to have a loving relationship. Your kids see this and having a mommy and daddy that love each other makes a big difference in the whole family dynamic. I feel so lucky to have Travis and to be committed to him no matter what comes our way. Our kids will never wonder if we love each other...they know it!
He worked for that irrigation district for almost 40 years and took the route of the tortoise. Slowly but surely he climbed his way up the ladder and in the end I think he won the race. My grandpa doesn't believe in debt and never buys things unless he has the cash to pay for it, he saves and on the day to day they live a normal life. My grandmother still clips coupons, cans fruits/jams and they still raise some vegetables. They don't eat out very often they live a pretty simple life at home. However they do know how to play. I just hope that someday I can retire and have all the freedom that they have. They enjoy amazing vacations building memories and experiences and enjoy spending afternoons on their boat. My grandpa worked hard and took the slow but steady way to top. It is admirable.
Spending time with family was always important to my grandpa. He took every vacation day that he had and took the family on trips close to home and far away. Even while he was working a high pressure job he spent the time with me to teach me things and help me with my homework. He never missed a band concert, dance recital, cheer competition, etc. Both of my grandparents were always my biggest fans. The encouraged me to push myself and taught me that I could do anything if I put my mind to it. I think I am especially grateful for them and my grandpa because they took me in as their own when they didn't have to. They could of been early empty nesters and had much more freedom and money but they chose to sacrifice their time and give me a better life. He is very giving and has been an excellent example.
I love him more than he will ever know and while we don't always see eye to eye he will be always be a hero in my eyes. He gave me a good foundation and taught me to think for myself. He taught me how to be responsible and best of all he taught me how to be a parent. I can only hope that I can support and love my kids the way that he loved me.
Father's day is always a little bit hard for me. While my grandpa truly was the best daddy a girl could of wanted, he isn't my dad. It sometimes is hard not knowing who your dad is. Is he even alive? Most of the time I don't ever let it get to me. I know that he is the one that really missed out. Yet there is always a small little part of me that wonders. Wonders why he left in the first place and why he has never attempted to find me in almost 32 years. How many siblings do I have that I have never met? What diseases run in the family? What traits do I have that are his..if any?? I have only seen about four pictures of him and even though he and my mom were married; he hasn't been seen since I was 3 months old. Everything I do know about him reinforces that I don't ever want to be in contact with him but I can't lie that I still wonder.
